Earworms

How do you recognize a false prophet?

I heard a story about a woman and her son that made me wonder about this. She had an experience in her congregation that really bothered her.
(Cue soundtrack, “Brother Love’s travelling salvation show by Neil Diamond)

Hot august night
And the leaves hanging down and the grass on the ground smellin’ sweet

move up the road
to the outside of town and the sound of that good gospel beat

I guess her pastor had invited a guest speaker who was supposed to be a prophet to pray and speak prophecy over the children in his congregation

Room gets suddenly still
And when you’d almost bet you could hear yourself sweat
He walks in

The gathered faithful with their children all in a line, he prays for each of them one by one. The parents smile or shed tears of joy as they hear him say to their children the usual “God has great plans for you” or “You will meet someone who will soon make a strong impression on you” or “The archangel Michael has some golden plates for you”. It was all fairly standard until he got to her son, and then the story takes an odd turn. He put his hand on the boy’s head and began to pray.

A worried look crept across his face.

Eyes black as coal
And when he lifts his face every ear in the place
Is on him

He avoided any of the aforementioned affirmations,

Starting soft and slow
like a small earthquake

said nothing to the young boy and said to his mother instead

and then he lets go
and half the valley shakes

“You need to pray for him every single day!”

Nice.

I wonder how he decided to choose that boy to receive that “word”. Did he pick him randomly? Or was it the way he was dressed? Was it the way his mother brought him forward full of hope and love for her son? Maybe he has some ridiculous pattern. I wish someone had called him out

Even if you believe God still speaks through prophets, did any of God’s prophets in scripture ever speak like this? Sure their words were like salt in a wound when they rebuked Kings and nations but they were pretty clear about what was wrong and what would happen next.


And though I have the gift of prophecy and understand all mysteries and all knowledge and though I have all faith so that I could remove mountains but have not love. I am nothing. – 1 Corinthians 13:2

And what is not a result of love?

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love – 1 John 4:18

This guy used a negative prophecy, if you want to call it that, to try and prove he was legit but most others seem to want to scratch an itch in people's ears. These guys sooth and massage Christians with their prosperity and healing messages. The result is that people are content to stay where they are and keep their eyes fixed on their material collections and the health of their bodies. It feels good to snuggle into a comfy pew, close your eyes and hear the fervent man on the stage rock the mic and boldly proclaim, “You know what God has for you?”

“Yes”, you may answer, “An eternity spent worshipping His Son”

“Er… yes”, he replies and then louder “but I mean in this world!”

“Oh,” you say “uh… trouble?”

“No sir! Spirit of unbelief, I rebuke you! Favour!”

“Favour! Favour! Favour!..”

(Camera focuses on the clock on the wall both hands do a couple quick laps around)

“… Favour! Favour! Favour!”



If God still speaks through prophets, If He still heals people or works miracles I don’t believe it’s through these guys. Jesus said John was the greatest prophet who ever lived and if he lived today would he wear an Armani suit, drive a Lexus or have an air-conditioned doghouse? Probably a safe bet to say no. But if you dare say “Uh… excuse me sir? I don’t think what you’re saying or doing lines up with scripture?” You’ll be sure to get told you’re calling the work of the Holy Spirit the work of the devil.

Here’s a quick test: Do they confess that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh? (1 John 4:2), Do they speak as the world and does the world listen to them? (1 John 4:5), Do they love their fellow Christians? (1 John 4:7-8), Do they have God’s Spirit? (1 John 4:13), Do they confess that Jesus is the Son of God? (1 John 4:15), Do they fear? (1 John 4:18), Do they say with their mouth “I love God” and hate their brother with their actions? (1 John 4:20)

Sits a ragged tent
Where the aint no trees
And that gospel group
Telling you and me

Its Love, Brother love, said Brother Love’s travellin’ salvation show
Pack up the babies grab the old ladies
everyone goes, everyone knows its Brother Love’s show

Brothers, I said Brothers
Now you got yourself two good hands
And when your brother is troubled
You got to reach out your one hand for him
'Cause that's what it's there for

And when your own heart is troubled
You got to reach out your other hand
Reach it out to the Man up there
'Cause that's what He's there for

Take my hand in yours Lord, walk with me this day
In my heart I know, I will never stray